Monday, June 11, 2007


She was hiding a dirty secret and I was going to get it out of her. Susan would have to come clean, or else! I dragged her up the stairs, she was unable to resist or defend herself against my manic determination. .Pushing open the door to the utilities room I bundled her inside, I didn’t want the rest of the family to know what I was doing. I was sure they would try to stop me. Susan slumped dejectedly in the corner staring up at me. There was no fear in her unblinking gaze, she was oblivious to the danger.

I got to work, I soon realized that using my hands was not going to be sufficient, I would have to take drastic steps to accomplish my task. I didn’t hang around to witness the effect of my actions, there would be plenty of time later to observe the results.

Time to pick the children up from school. The important thing was to act normally, they must suspect nothing, of course they noticed her absence but I kept my cool, feigning ignorance of her whereabouts. The rest of the day passed with agonizing slowness, every minute felt like an hour. Eventually the girls’ bedtime arrived. Once I was sure that they were settled in for the night and there was no danger of being followed I climbed the stairs once again to finish off my business.

Gazing down at her wretched form I was shocked by the extent of damage that my ministrations had caused, the mess was unbelievable. There was a terrible gash across her belly and her insides spilled out in an untidy heap across the floor. A similar wound across her neck had left her head hanging limply to one side as if she were asking a silent question.

Overwhelmed with remorse I sank into a nearby chair wondering how I could explain it to the children. They had been so fond of this creature, lavishing affection on her. She had never criticized for her shortcomings as I so often was, despite this I was filled with sadness by her demise.

Some teddy bears just couldn’t take the rough and tumble of a machine wash


Michael said...

Hlarious. I remember that bear too. You big meany.

Dan said...

LOL! Excellent story Cathy! You had me guessing there for a moment.

It reminds me of the ventriloquist dummy I accidentally beheaded when I was a young lad. What a sad story that was!

Tina said...

You had me going there....very clever Cathy!!! As always, a brilliant post. Tina xoxo

Pauline said...

Oh No! Not Susie Bear! Are you sure she is beyond repair ?
Polo Bear will be devastated, how can I tell him?

Pauline said...

Thank God Abalam Kish did not survive to see this day!

Michael said...


Top cat said...

You stinker! you really had me going on this one.:)

julie said...

Wow! I wanted to read this aloud to my 22 year old just for the sheer pleasure of reading aloud. I knew he would say no so I laughed hoping to evoke a reaction from him...nothing.


I love it!

Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

Wonderful conclusion—and very true!

Miss Understood said...

Great story! And it seems it's a true one, too!

Keshi said...

LOL too funny!


Queenie said...

Really worried at one point, my little ticker was going like mad.
Your posts need a rating.
Let me know when the films due out!!!

Blancodeviosa said...

oh hell! u had me going....

lime said...

oh i think i just shed a tear!


EBEZP said...

Oh Cathy that was so well written it really did have me going. Trouble is the pic at the bottom sort gave it away. Good 1!

Hammer said...

My "Mr Bear" is covered in Duct tape.

val said...

I'm not sure who gets evil person of the year award, you or JoJo's husband, who left the wormery untended in the garage and MURDERED all the poor ickle worms!

cathy said...

michael, I will get her repaired.

dan, but I loved my teddy and you hate ventiloquists' dummies

tina, almost the end of my posts for a while.

pauline, tell polo that we are doing everything we can for her.
Sob! Abalam kish :(

michael, don't worry our lips are sealed.

TC, stinker! well maybe I could do with a shower.

julie, he probably thought you were losing it:)

ss nick, do you have a tragic teddy story?

miss understood, sadly it is:(

keshi, you're a hard woman:)

queenie, hope I didn't cause any permanent damage.

blanco, tee hee hee.

lime, I shed several trying to get the stuffing out of the washer.

ebezp, I made the pic smaller after another friend mentionrd this problem but I didn't have the heart to delete it.

hammer, learn to sew!

val, I thought my daughter had strange pets!!

Pauline said...

I'm sorry Cathy but Polo considers your treatment of his childhood sweetheart to be unbearable. He can barely bear to speak of the matter but does suggest that you take care not to lose your bearings in the woods any time soon. He assures me that the consequences would be no picnic.

puerileuwaite said...

Darn. Since this occurred outside of the U.S., I won't be able to review the case on one of our many "True Crime" shows.

Travis said...

I was so tense reading that...until I had scrolled down far enough to see the picture of the teddy bear!

Logophile said...

Oh yes, I've hosted similar moments of destruction and terror here. Love it!

Jocelyn said...

You have no idea how much I needed that last sentence.

I was about to have to swear off you forever. You scared me.

Angell said...

Found you through Jules some time ago and love your stuff.

This was incredible - talk about building the suspense.

Nicely done.