Monday, May 5, 2008

The Best Laid Plans...

Diet Plan - day one

Breakfast - Glass of skimmed milk and 2 melba toast.
I’ll substitute coffee for the milk, coffee isn’t that fattening and…
… well melba toast is dry so I’ll have a couple of cigarettes.

So coffee and cigarettes, same as usual.

Snack 1 – 2 pieces of fruit.
Who the hell’s got time to snack? By the time I’ve gotten the house straight it will be lunchtime anyway!

Lunch – 1 chicken breast without the skin, I slice of bread, salad,.
Damn it! no chicken and the kids want hamburgers.
Substitute - hamburger in a sesame bun, ketchup,

it’s made of tomatoes
and I’ll have a pickle too

because that is cucumber, nearly .

Snack 2 - a piece of fruit.
Give me a break I’m working here! Like this kid is going to understand my explanation of passive voice if it’s muffled by banana.

Evening meal. – Lentil soup, salad, 1 slice of bread.
Just a minute, lentils are similar to beans, cocoa is made out of beans…mmm
Substitute, Hot chocolate and toast, yummy.

I always drink plenty of water so that’s alright then.

I think that went quite well.
I’ll just peek at tomorrow’s menu before going to sleep…

… Breakfast, same as today.

Ok coffee and cigs is fine by me

Snack – A glass of fruit juice.
Good I think I can manage that.

Lunch, Poached fish and boiled greens...

...Yeah, Right!!


In Ink said...

This week I have been mostly eating prunes.

cathy said...

in ink, that would explain the underpants

chica40208 said...

lol like your blog funny post

Travis said...

Well, drinking lots of water is healthy anyway.


Good luck!

BBC said...

I eat to live, not live to eat. Eat anything I like and have never been overweight so never have to think of a diet. Well, I do a lot of physical work so that helps a lot.

Sex is good for weight control, as well as good well being of mind, try that.

Anyway, just posted another camper project update.

BBC said...

Oh, life is uncertain, eat dessert first. I'm having carrot cake with lemon/butter frosting on it in a bowl of milk this morning.

Maybe I will or maybe I won't have anymore breakfast than that. Maybe I won't even eat anything else the rest of the day, it doesn't take much to keep me going.

Maybe it's the evening beers that keep me going, they sure help with my sanity anyway. LOL

lime said...

i like your diet better. probably why i look like the picture you posted.

Bond said...

Lentils = Cocoa..

Now that is one stretch there missy!

Akelamalu said...

Ah the substitute diet - I like it!

Hammer said...

Can't diet around kids that's for sure.

Melba toast is the same calories as a piece of bread it just has the water removed.

puerileuwaite said...

No problemo. I like women in all shapes and sizes, and there are many interesting ways to burn calories.

I would chase that lady around the casa a la Benny Hill, to cite just one example.

And speaking of variety, my "Junior Detective Hair Sample Test Kit" should confirm which area is natural, if any.

Good move substituting for the beans, as I would have to give you up for lentils.

tz said...

hi, thanks for visiting my blog...
and yes, pickles are cucumbers...they should be counted as a veggie (but, trust me if you saw me you wouldn't take dieting advice from me!)

and vincent, oh my gosh I just LOVE fun you have a blog of him....

BBC said...

For the record I can cope with cussing and even cuss myself at times.It depends on the context.

Well, I don't know what your context is Cathy, so I will just swear the way I want to and see if you can deal with it. If you can't that is okay with me. :-)

Scott said...

Cigarettes are bad for you! I like the art. Hmmm... I've always been somewhat of a chubby chaser in my romantic pursuits. Though I've never actively tried to romance a woman with something like small cell carcinoma from her smoking addiction!

Blancodeviosa said...

i found out that my jethro bowl of raisin bran has 900,000 calories.

Sandy said...

ha ha so funny. but still after eating all that if the girl in pic has managed only that amount of weight i m surprised.

Phain said...

coffee and cigarettes...the breakfast of champions! i'm lucky if i have time to stuff a piece of toast in my face most mornings. ususally it's me standing in front of the breakroom vending machine trying to decide what probably has more eggs and milk in it - the cheetos or the snickers.

cathy said...

nos32chica, ty.

travis,I ate a raw carrot today.

bbc, "Sex is good for weight control,never been overweight"
You want to tell that to a pregnant woman. LOL.
Cake for breakfast sounds good.

lime, But, she knows she's sexy!

bond, If God hadn't intended me to use my imagination he shouldn't have given it to me.

akela,Yeah well you get in trouble for substituting other stuff. lol.

Hammer, kids are death to a diet and melba toast is boring.

pug, I knew I could rely on you.

tz,Come to think of it beer is mainly water. Poor Vincent has been nweglected of late.

bbc,Tell me something I don't know!

scott, I'm too old for you anyway :)

blanco, there is something very wrong there.LOL.

sandy, she is a bit fatter than me but she is gorgeous, don't you think?

phain, cheetos are gross! go for the chocolate! What's with the eggs and milk anyway?

Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

Wonderful! I am laughing at this post as I am sitting here "snacking" on my Nutrisystem Chocolate Raspberry Bar!

Yuk! (But there is chocolate)

Mona said...

The best laid plans...what a coincidence, I was reminded of that title of a Sidney Sheldon when I wrote my 55 today!

That was so funny Cathy, & so true!

Ps> in Inks profile has always been an awakening call, keeps you on the track!

BBC said...

You went to my blog and used a four letter word.

Oh, wait, never mind, I'm right proud of you. :-)

ann said...

Cathy.... where did you find that pic of me... OY!!!!!!!

BBC said...


val said...

Ann, you KNOW you are only half the woman I am, it's me in that picture, only my boobs are bigger.

Cathy, it's the way you tell 'em.